All's well that ends well - E. A. Poe
All's well that ends well. -Poe.    Bother. -Pooh.
Always avoid the inevitable
Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.
Always be smarter than the people who hire you.
Always remember where you came from so you can return.
Always store beer in a dark place - Heinlein
Always tell her she is beautiful.
Am I The Only One With A Salami In His Trenchcoat?
America, worst nation in the world save for all the rest.
American by birth - Southern by the grace of God.
An atheist has no invisible means of support.
An attacker must vanquish, a defender need only survive.
An empty stomach is not a good political advisor.
An evil man is snared by his own sin.
An expert is someone from out of town.
An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind - Ghandi
An honest politician is one who STAYS bought!
An idea is not responsible for fools who believe in it.
An interstellar war can ruin your whole day.
Anarchy is against the law.
ANARCHY.COM -> (A)bort, (R)etry, (O)verthrow System
Anatomically Correct beats Politically Correct any day.
Ancient Chinese curse:"May you live in interesting times"
Ancient Evil In Training
And now for something completely different.
And now we return you to your (ir)regular conference...
And on the 8th Day God said, "Murphy, you're in charge."
And Satan said to God,"But where will you get a lawyer?"
And she disappeared in a puff of logic.
and that is how we know the Earth is banana-shaped
and then the fun began - N. Bonaparte
And then you typed 'G=C800:5', right?
And they said unto Jesus, "How the Hell did you do that?!
And who decides what is just? Who decides what is right?
and you were expecting something profound & witty?
And, pray tell, whose imagination are you a figment of?
Angels and ministers of grace offend us! -- Snakespeare
Annoy a liberal: Ask them to be truthful.
Another casualty of the seduction of art. - Hobbes
Another good mind not yet ruined by higher education!
Antelope Freeway, 1/64 mile.
Antifloccinaucinihilipihilificationism rules ok!
Any priest or shaman may be presumed guilty until proved innocent. - RAH
Any sufficiently advanced magic looks like technology!
Any system that relies on human reliability is unreliable
Anybody seen the internet around here?
Anyone ever found a use for those tractor feed cutouts?
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot
Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
Anything not a constant, is not a commandment from God.
Anything that kills you makes you... well, dead.
Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.
Apathy Error: Don't Bother Striking Any Key
Applicants wanted! - Darth Vader School of Management
Archaeologist: one whose career lies in ruins
Are the noises in my head bothering you?
Are you implying that coconuts are migratory?
Are you suggesting that coconuts are migratory?
Are you telling me a 686DX/200 is ALL you got ?
Are you using Windows, or is that just an XT?
Argue if you must, just remember I'm right
Arguments with furniture are rarely productive.
Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity
As confused as a termite in a yo-yo
As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.
Ask me anything: if I don't know, I'll make up something.
Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies...
Asphault = Proctologist's malpractice insurance
Assist: v. To increase the factor of incompetency by 1.
Assumption is the mother of all screwups.
At last, the Eludium Q36 explosive space modulator
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Attend Miskatonic U. - Why study >lesser< evils?
Auntie Em: Hate you, Hate Kansas. Taking the dog.
Auntie Em: Hate you. Hate Kansas. Took the Dog. Dorothy.
Avoid hangovers - stay drunk
Avoid morning breath...  Sleep till noon!
Avoidence - Surrender, Confrontation - Attack
Ay, every inch a king. - King Lear
B: not found, formatting other drives instead....
Back from the shadows again ...
Back off man, We're scientists!!!
Backup aborted: Please remove disk #92 and start over...
Backup Initiated:  Insert disk 1 of 1362.
Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic
Bad Command or Filename.  Or maybe you screwed up.
Bagpipes are just Hell's way of giving hints.
Ban the bomb.  Save the world for conventional warfare.
Barney:What happens when you feed a smurf after midnight.
Basic programmers never die, they gosub and don't return.
Basic Vampire: If it screams, it's not food... yet.
Bathing beauty: A girl worth wading for
BBS: a method to triple your phone bill.
Be creative  -  invent a perversion!
Be moderate in all things, including moderation...
Be spontaneous.......combust.
Beam me up, Scotty; this ISN'T the ladies' room!
Beam's Choice Green Label -- It's SMOOTH!!!!
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.....
Been there, done that, got the mouse mat.
Been there.  Done that.  Jumped bail.
Been through Hell?? and what did you bring me??
Beer is Better: Beer is always in season.
Beer. It's not just for breakfast anymore!
BEERWARE: If it works, buy yourself a beer.
Before making a backup copy, first destroy the original
Before you see the light, you must die.
Beheading: The ultimate loss of face.
Behind every successful man--a surprised mother-in-law.
Being common isn't one of my strengths.
Being human does have certain advantages.
Being ignorant isn't your fault, staying ignorant is.
Being in beta means never having to say you're sorry.
Being paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
Believe the road goes on forever and the party never ends.
Ben Dover & C. Howit Feels -- Attorney's at law
Best cure for a case of nerves is a case of beer.
Best file compression around!  "DEL *.*" - 100% comp.
Best thing about the future: it comes one day at a time.
Better taglines through confiscation.
Better than a poke in the eye with a stick.
Between two evils, always pick one you never tried before
Beware False Messengers, and Trust Only Your Enemies.
Beware of a tiger in its lair or a moderator in his echo
Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
Beware! This is a dangerous product, manuals required.
Big or small We tax them all.
Big toe: Feature on man to accommodate coroner's tag.
Bigomy: one wife too many.  Monogamy: same idea.
Bigot: Anyone who's winning an argument with a liberal
Bill your doctor for the time spent in the waiting room
Billy Bob's Road Kill Cafe - You kill'em, we grill'em.
Bio-Genetix Eng. Labs: "Playing God so you don't have to"
Birds of a feather fluck together.
Black holes are big attractions.
Black Holes are what happens when God divides by Zero
Black holes suck.
Blended coffee...todays & yesterdays.
Blessed are the censors: For They Shall Inhibit the Earth
Blessed are the censors; they shall inhibit the earth.
Blessed are the meek, for they make great scapegoats.
Blessed are the pessimists, for they hath made backups
Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier.
Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! Rage! Blow!
Bluff means never having to sway your story.
Bo knows your girlfriend.....
Boring women have immaculate homes
Bork was a dork... that's not too political, is it?
Borrow  money from pessimists. They don't expect it back.
Bought some powdered water.....What do I add??
Boy, this Soylent Green tastes great!  What's the recipe?  -SLR
Brain damage? No thanks, I already have some.
Brain Disengaged; Call Back Tomorrow.
Brain the size of a planet and I have to talk to humans.
Brains...BRAINS!  Fresh brai... oh, wrong conference.
Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore...
Bring on the dancing girls!
Bring order to your life, use random numbers.
Brought to you by your local SPAM Appreciation Society.
BS (bee ess): n. An uninformed statement.
Budweiser: Breakfast of Champions
Bug removal Tagline.  Bang forehead here to debug---->@@
Bureau of Natural Disasters - Planning Division
Burn the flag. Burn the bra. Burn the bridges behind you.
Burned out but still glowing!
Burning houses simply helps keep me from going Sane, Doc.
But honey, we can afford it, I sold your car
But Honey, you NEED VGA for Dbase management!
But I thought YOU did the backups!
Butcher the Intelligensia in the name of Sanity!
Buy a Pentium so you can reboot Windows faster!
Buy OS/2: Keep Bill Gates on his toes.
By all means, let's not confuse ourselves with the facts.
By Pendragon's sword the Dark shall fall.
C A U T I O N - I drive the same way you do.
C program run.  C program crash.  C programmer quit.
C-4 works much better than a hammer when things get stuck
C:\CATHOLIC\VATICAN.EXE:  Okay program, but no updates, _ever_.
C:\DAMSEL.EXE x-linked with DISTRESS.COM. RESCUE? (y/n?)
Caffeine is my only *real* friend...
CALCULUS..... the agony and dx/dt.
Call me Ishmael.  I won't ANSWER, but..
Calm down. It's only ones and zeros.
Can I trade in this life for a full refund?
Can you believe that thing is STILL moving?
Can you hold this grenade a second, I dropped the pin...
Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"
Canadian Dos prompt= "Like,Insert Disk #1,eh"
Cannibals send out for pizza boys.
Carefull, we might be landing on your street
Carpenter's Rule:  Cut to fit;  beat into place.
Catch the Blue Wave!
Cats--the ultimate agents of Entropy.
Caution: I drive using The Force
CCITT- Can't Conceive Intelligent Thoughts Today
Cease & Desist citizen, or I'll reduce your head to a fine mist.
Celebrate your freedom: Read a banned book.
Celtic Magic?  Didn't he play basketball???
Cement shoes, dirt cheap; ask for Guido.
Chance makes our parents, but choice makes our friends.
Change is inevitable...except from a vending machine.
Chaotic Evil means never having to say your sorry.
CHASTITY:  The most unnatural of sexual perversions.
Chat mode is DISABLED during Quantum Leap
Cheap fuses are protected by expensive chips
Cheer Up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.
Chef: (shef) A cook who swears in French.
Chicago:  Vaporware of the desperate and scared
Children: the most common sexually transmitted disease.
Chile today. Hot tamale.
Chili, the national food ... Fart, the national odor.
Chivalry is not dead - it's on life support.
Choking on another Xanth novel? Try the Heinlein Maneuver
Christmas is coming, the geese are getting *very* worried
Chthulhu calls his shots.
CIA Motto: In God we trust, all others we polygraph
City Morgue: You stab 'em, we slab 'em.
Clean this stuff up or we'll all wind up in jail!
Climate is what we expect.  Weather is what we get. - Heinlein
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right, here I am.
CMOS: Commonly Misunderstood Option Switches
Cold as Night, Dark as Death
College is just high school with ashtrays...
College's don't make fools; they only develop them
Columbus HAD a fourth ship--it sailed over the edge.
Combat gear doesn't make a man.....
Come on Mr. Krinkle tell me why...
Come on!  There's plenty of room out here on this limb!
Command Not Understood. . . Now erasing Hard Drive
Commercial Software - The Devils payback!
Committee: a lifeform with 12 legs and no brain.
Communism is like one big phone company.
Compile, run, curse.  Recompile, rerun, recurse.
Computer Excuse #3: Systems analyst needs psychoanalyst
Computer Hacker Wanted.  Must have own axe.
Confuse your local coroner ... die happy.
Congress Virus: Overdraws disk space, won't release files
Congress's road to h*ll is now a 4 lane highway
Congress:"They have what it takes to take what you got"
Conspiracy can never replace simple stupidity.
Consult with a real expert - Call your mother.
Consult with an Expert - Call your Mother.
CONSULTANT: Person who makes good on salesman's promises
Contains less than 2% U.S. RDA for this echo
Contraceptives: to be used on all conceivable occasions.
Cover me.  I'm going to change lanes.
Crackpot can't play, he's working on his thesis.
Cream rises to the top... but then, so does scum...
Create opportunities week. Blackmail a senior executive.
Creativity is great, plagiarism's faster.
Crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.
Crime, Sex, Alcohol, Drugs... God, I love Congress!
Criminal lawyer?...Isn't that redundant?
Crossbows don't kill people; quarrels kill people.
Cry "ribbit" and let slip the frogs of war!
Cthulhu calls.........COLLECT!
Cthulhu in '96: why settle for the LESSER evil?
Cthulhu loves you...on a Ritz cracker.
Cthulhu loves you...on a sesame bun.
Cthulhu loves you...with a tossed salad and white wine.
Cthulhu loves you...with an apple in your mouth.
Cthulhu Saves! ... in case he's hungry later.
Cthulhu saves... passes to Hastur... the crowd goes mad!!
Cthulu for President: Why settle for the Lesser Evil??
Cthulu fthagn! Cthulu fthagn! Cthulu fthagn! Oh, wow, that really ...
Cure for postal strikes: mail them their strike pay.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat, my 12 gauge did..
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. I got `em with the mower!
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect
Cursor:  What you become when your system crashes.
Custer was fitted for an Arrow shirt.
Cut my pizza into six pieces please.  I can't eat eight.
cyberpunk (si'-ber-punk) n. - a computer with an attitude
Damn it Jim, I'm an Alzheimer's patient, not a...uh...uh.
Damn the documentation, full speed ahead!
Darth Vader: Robert Dole's long-lost half brother.
Dawn:  The time when people of reason go to bed.
Dead reckoning: The method of navigation by a driver.
Death before dishonor and either before soap operas.
Death before dishonor, neither before breakfast.
Death Comes as the end...
Death is not the end; there remains the litigation.
Death, Life, and Infinite are the only constants.
Decadent Capitalist and proud of it!
Deep down...I'm really a pretty superficial kind of guy.
Def. of a beetle : A fly on steroids.
Def. of Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
Defeat may test you.  It need not stop you.
Define the universe.  Give three examples.
Deicide - The Extinction of All That's Holy........
Democracy-A catchword used by Democrats and Republicans
Demons are a Ghouls best Friend.
Deny everything - remove all evidence - & make counter-accusations!
Department of Redundancy Department
Desperate times call for cheap shots.
Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.
Detour: The roughest distance between two points.
Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Did you hear that?  They've shut down the main reactor!
Didn't I meet you in some other hallucination??
Die: To stop sinning suddenly.
Difference between a virus & windows? Viruses never fail.
Difference between Genius & Stupidity? Genius has limits.
Digital circuits are made from analog parts.
Dime:  a dollar with all the taxes taken out.
Ding, Dong the Lich is dead
Dip it in chocolate, it'll be fine.
Diplomacy is saying "nice doggy" until you find a rock.
Diplomacy: The art of letting someone else get your way.
Diplomacy: The patriotic lying for one's country.
Dirty Old Men: Men who haven't quite given up women yet..
Disclose classified information only when a NEED TO KNOW
Discoveries are made by not following instructions,
Divers do it deeper and stay down longer.
Divorce is not an effective deterrent to marriage.
Do cross-eyed dyslexics read normally?
Do Files get embarassed when they are unzipped?
Do I even WANT ancestors? Some of those I found I wish I could lose.
Do I ice her?  Do I marry her?  Which wunna deez?
Do it tommorrow. You've made enough mistakes for one day
DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND - the fault is with reality.
Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps
Do not look in laser with remaining eye.
Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you!
Do Winchesters sneeze when they catch a virus?
Do you multitask or just run Windoze?
Do you prefer gin and platonic or scotch and sofa?
Docs? We don need no stinkeeng docs!
Docs? Who wants to look at the Docs. Nurses are better...
Docs? Why would I want to look at the Docs. Nurses are better :)
Doctors bury mistakes. Architects plant ivy.
Documentation - The worst part of programming.
Documentation is for people who can't read.
Documentation is for wimps who cant read listings or the object code.
Does "PIRATE" software come with a treasure map?
Does a Kzin fear to follow where a Puppeteer leads?
Does history record any case in which the majority was right? - Heinlein
Does killing time harm eternity?
Does Microsoft mean "small and limp"?
Does the term 'Rational Anarchist' ring a bell?
Doing strange things in the name of art.
Don't 'yield' to temptation. Go and hunt it down...
Don't be sexist.  Broads hate that.
Don't be silly... of course we'll survive...
Don't be stupid; of *course* we intend to resist you!
Don't bother pressing that key. There is no Esc.
Don't bother pushing that key. There is no Esc
Don't call me a sexist, you bimbo!
Don't call me ignorant, you supercilious twit.
Don't confuse me with facts.
Don't crush that dwarf, hand me the pliers!
Don't drink and park...Accidents cause people.
Don't give me that "kinkier than thou" attitude ...!
Don't just stand there...KNEEL!!
Don't let me get too deep. It's already too deep in here.
Don't let school interfere with your education.
Don't look at me in that tone of voice!
Don't look conspicuous-it draws fire.
Don't look for flaws as you go through life.
Don't meddle in the affairs of Wizards...
Don't mess with the Zombie, @TO@
Don't push it, you fool! That's the History Eraser button!
DON'T read the manual! Just WING that sucker!
Don't run away, it's only me...
Don't steal...the government hates competition.
Don't take criticism from just anybody.
Don't take life seriously...it isn't permanent.
Don't take life seriously; You won't get out alive anyway
Don't take life so seriously.  It's not forever.
Don't tell me how hard you work. Tell me how much you get
Don't try to have the last word. You might get it. - Heinlein
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
Don't vote - it only encourages them.
Don't worry . . . everything is out of control
Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo
Don't worry, Inspector. Just a swamp cult, no big deal...
Don't worry... It's under warranty.
Dorothy- hate OZ, took shoes, find your own way home Toto
DOS Perot:  you boot, it decides whether it wants to run.
Dracula was a vein man...
Drag me, drop me.  Treat me like an object.
Dragon?  What dragon?  You said we were looking for a worm.
Dragons:  Friendly Toasters.
Drilling for oil is boring.
Drink till she's cute. Stop before you get married.
Drink your coffee!  There are people in India sleeping.
Drive A: format failed.  Restarting with drive C:.
Drive defensively.  Buy a tank.
Drugs: n - Substance Programmers use while programming.
Duct tape, not The Force, holds the universe together.
Dude did you see her? I think I'm pitching a tent!
Due to inflation, all clouds will now be lined with zinc.
Dumb luck beats sound planning every time.  Trust me.
Dusk lures like a lyre beckoning the quietude
Dyslexics of the world untie!
Early to bed, early to rise; makes people suspicious.
Earn cash in your spare time -- blackmail your friends.
Earth is 98% full...please delete anyone you can.
Earth:  mostly harmless.
Eat Healthy, Exercise, and Die Anyway...
Eat more lamb.  10,000,000 coyotes can't all be wrong.
Eat the rich - the poor are tough and stringy.
Eat yogurt and get cultured.
Egad, I believe I've blown another synapse.  -SLR
ELECTROCUTION : High Tech Burning at the Stake!
Employees are instructed to restrict their orgasms to the lunch hour.
End rush-hour traffic now!  Legalize vehicular weaponry!
Enter any 12-digit prime number to continue.
Equal Opportunity: The prospect of pillage for the meek
EROTIC: using a feather.  KINKY: using the whole duck!
Eternity?  Straight ahead, turn left at infinity.
Ettore's law: the other line always moves faster
Eval Day 1,094,583,217 * I Support Shareware!
Eval Day 15 *           Assimilate culture? (Y/n)
Even after fusion, confusion remains.
Even Ockham occasionally cut himself shaving.
Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion.
Ever meet a Sysop who would admit the problem was his?
Ever notice how much Cheeze Whiz resembles silicone caulking?
Every absurdity has @TO@ to defend it.
Every absurdity has a champion to defend it.
Every child should be given the desire to learn.
Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man.
Every morning is the dawn of a new error...
Every saint has a past and every sinner a future - Wilde
Every Silver lining has a clone around it.
Every solution breeds new problems.
Every sun has a golden lining
Every time a Country singer dies, ten more pop up.
Every time I use a MicroSoft product I feel "dirty."
Everybody lies about sex. - Robert A. heinlein
Everybody loves a moose; they just don't know it.
Everybody must believe - I believe I'll have another beer
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film.
Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid.
Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
EVERYONE is weird...some of us are proud of it.
Everything @TO@ does is needlessly violent.
Everything flows and nothing stays. -- Heraclitus
Everything I do is needlessly violent.
Everything I like is illegal, immoral or expensive!
Evolution is God's way of issuing updates.
Excuse me while I change into something more formidable.
Excuse me while I crouch down behind my asbestos shield.
Excuse me, did you say something?
Exercise before kinky sex . . . be fit to be tied.
Experience is directly proportional to ruined equipment
Experience=a name everyone gives to his mistakes.
Experiencing synaptical difficulties; Please stand by.
Explain counter-clockwise to someone with a digital watch
Extinct species will never be Born Again.
Extra Credit: Define the universe. Give 3 examples.
Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses.
Exxon - greasing the coastline for smoother boating!
Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a side order of fries
Face reality; yet, indulge yourself in fantasy and fairy tales.
Fact.  Stranger than any science fiction.
Facts, though interesting, are irrelevant.
Fahr-ferg-nug-en: German for "Can't afford the Mercedes."
Failure reading left hemisphere <A>bort <R>etry <F>rolic?
Failure: The path of least persistence.
Falling ego zone.  Keep ID covered at all times.
Famous Last Words - "The backups can wait."
Famous Last Words: Look, I'm driving with my eyes closed!
Famous words, "Trust me, I'm a consultant"
Fanatics do everything with unmatched dedication.
Fasten your seat belt--I wanna try something.
Faster horses, Younger women, Older whiskey, More Money!
Fatal Error: Size Of Thought Exceeds Available Memory.
Fatal Error: User Executed
Fear not, for I have given you authority
Fear the Stark Fist of Removal.
Features should be discovered, not documented
Feel lucky????  Update your software!
Few hours in life are more agreeable than afternoon tea
Fight crime....shoot back
Fight Crime:  Shoot a politician
File not found.  Delete *.* and change directory? (Y/N)_
Fingers not found - Pound head on keyboard to continue.
Finish the project.  We'll buy you a new family.
First listen to sermon, THEN eat missionary.
First rule of adaption:  only when evolving.
First rule of marriage: If YOU'RE Right, APOLOGIZE FAST!
First, push the button.  Then find out what it does.
First, we'll kill all the programmers
Flying is not dangerous.... CRASHING is dangerous.
Food, glorious food. Hot sausage with mustard....
Fools fight one another, but wise men agree together.
For a good time, don't call me.
For all my dreams are haunted by a fire on the moon.
For God's sake get the hell off... she's dead, Jim!
For Reply, send a self-abused stomped Antelope to...
FOR SALE: Used Dyson sphere, needs work. Priced to sell.
For sincere personal advice, page your sysop at 3 A.M.
For those who like peace & quiet: a phoneless cord.
For yerz ago i cudent evin spel injuneer. Now i are one
Forego novocaine: Transcend dental medication.
Forget patience! I'm gonna kill something...
Forget the manual, phone the author at home!
Forgive your enemies but never forget their faces
FREE PRIZE! NO PURCHASE NEEDED!  (Details inside box)
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Friends don't let friends use Prodigy
Friends: People who dislike the same people we do.
From IRS Agents that go bump in the night, deliver us.
From the pastor of the 1st Church of Electron Flux
Fun with Greek #4: Fee, í, fo, fum!
Funny how life imitates LSD...
Funny, only sensible people agree with me.
Furry Weddings are were "groom" is a verb, not a noun
Gargling twice daily is a good way to see if your neck leaks.
Gee, Mr. Wizard! Aren't nuclear reactors dangerous?
Geee, is that what static electricity does to cpu chips?
Genetic engineering:  heir styling.
Genius is ten percent inspiration and 50% capital gains.
Gentleman: One who can play bagpipes but chooses not to.
Get a taste of religion.  Bite a preacher.
Get the facts first - you can distort them later !
Getting caught is the mother of invention.
Ghosts are merely unsubstantiated roomers.
Gimme $50 Or I'll Call Your Religion A Cult.
Gimme a match, I think my gas tank is empty.
Give 'em a fair trial, then hang 'em!
Give me a gun and I'll kill all the liberals.
Give my lawfirm a call sometime: Dewey, Cheetum & Howe.
Give sadists a fair crack at the whip.
Give up, you'll only live till you die.
Go ahead, jump. 100,000 lemmings can't be wrong.
Go ahead, speak your mind! I'll enjoy the silence.
Go climb a gravity well.
God created all men.  But Sam Colt made them equal.
God created anchovies.  Satan put them on pizza.
God fights on the side with the heaviest artilliary.--RAH
God isn't dead, he just couldn't find a parking place.
Good aim means never having to say you're sorry.
Gosh I miss George. Heck, I even miss Jimmy!
Gotta run.  My neighbors just sighted Elvis making crop circles.
Government - the only vessel known to leak from the top
Government Tagline. Takes up space, no known function.
Government: we can't do that, it makes too much sense.
Graduate of the Mad Max School of Defensive Driving
Great minds always meet at infinity.
Great minds twist alike.
Great! She's naked and I forgot the rope!!
Great; Custer had a plan, too.
Gross Ignorance:  144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.
Growing old is mandatory...  Growing up is optional.
Guilt trips: the nuclear weapon of relationships.
Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.
Gun Control means .174" @ 100yds.
Gun Control means using 2 hands
Gunpowder and alcohol DO mix - but it tastes awful!
Guns don't kill people.  I kill people.
Guns don't kill people.  Moderators do.
Guns don't kill people.  Moderators kill people.
Guns don't kill.  Fast-moving projectiles do.
Guru Meditation Error -- Insufficent User
H*LL (n): Backing up a 600 meg drive with 360K floppies
H*ll hath no fury like a woman scorned.
H*ll, if I was sane why would I be here?
Hand me that dolphin burger.  Yeah, the one in styrofoam.
Hand me that planet, will you?
Hard Work never killed anyone, so why chance it?
Has that file been saved? No, but we're praying for it.
Have a nice day - unless you've made other plans
Have an affair.  It will help break up the monogamy.
Have I ever claimed to be sane?
Have no fear - I never attack lesser beings.
Have you clubbed an ignorant human today?
Have you clubbed an ignorant kitten today?
Have you crashed your Windows today?
Have you hugged an electric fence today?
Haven't you got any pleasant facts I can face?
HD Crash: (A)bort,(R)etry,(S)tart Self-Destruct Sequence
He did say cleared for final ......didnt he ???
He died to take away your sins, not your mind.
He does the work of 3 Men...Moe, Larry & Curly
He has a train of thought.  You have a tricycle...
He has all the charm of a dirty Christmas card.
He isnt dead; He's electroencephalographically challenged
He knows little who will tell his wife all he knows
He ran for the curb but I bagged him before he made it.
He said "KUNG FU!" I said "M-16." He said "Peace Brother"
He stalks to the beat of a violent state of time ..
He was ever greater than his opportunities.
He who dies with the highest upgrade wins.
He who has never hoped can never despair. -- G.B. Shaw
He who hesitates is trampled by the mob.
He who laughs last probably backed up his hard disk...
He who lives by the sword gets shot with a AK47
He who steps on others to reach the top has good balance.
He'll feel a lot better once we robbed a couple banks.
He's a SOB -- but at least he's *our* SOB.
He's dead Dave, everyone's dead, everyone is dead Dave!
He's dead Jim, kick him yourself and see.
He's dead, Jim; kick him yourself if you don't believe me.
He's not a lousy pilot, he's gravitationaly challenged.
He's not a politician; he's just ethically challenged.
He's not dead, Jim.  He's just considering moving to Seattle.
He's not drunk; He's neurologically challenged.
Headline: War dims hope for peace.
Health tip: Red meat IS good. Blue fuzzy meat is BAD.
Heaven doesn't want me & Hell's afraid I'll take over.
Heavy rain: What you get 2 hours after washing your car.
Hee, hee, eees beeg trouble for moose and squirrel...
Heisenberg really wasn't certain about this.
Heisenburg slept here... or did he?
Helicopters don't fly; they beat the Air into Submission.
Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned
Hell hath no fury like vested interest masquerading as moral principle.
Hell hath no misery like a backup ignored.
Hell is empty... but our Congress is full.  Hmmm........
Help fight against a cure for nymphomania.
Help Prevent Birth Defects; Castrate a RedNeck!
Here is my fist, please run towards it very fast.
Here, doggie.  Chase the nice stick of dynamite.
Here, you go first, you're immune to bullets.
Hermits have no sense of peer pressure.
Hero for Hire - Dragons Slain.
Hey, buddy ya need a Comp Sci degree? How about a watch?
Hey, Santa, how much for your list of naughty girls?
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's Hand Grenades I throw!
Hi! I'm heavily armed, easily bored, & off medication.
Hi, I'm from the government. I'm here to help you.
Hi, Mr. Rex! I'm Barney!...I love you...you love m.....*CHOMP!!!!*
High message:  943432.  Message you last read: 59
Highballing the skyways between the stars
Higher Versions mean more bugs found...
History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.
History Repeats Itself Because Nobody Listens
Hit and run means never having to say you're sorry.
Hmmmmm.... never tried an atomic bomb before.
Ho! Ha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!
Ho! Haha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust! WHACK!
Homeless man's sign:  Will be President for Food.
Honest, Officer! The dwarf was on fire when I got here!
Honest, Officer! The smurf was on fire when I got here!
Honey, your IQ test came back. It's negative.
Honk if you like obscene gestures!
Honk if you're illiterate
Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
Horn broke...watch for finger.
Hostages? What do you mean, I thought they were targets..
Hot Tip #5: The light at the end of a tunnel is a train
House physician - a misnomer for a carpenter/repairman.
How about a 7-day wait period on buying Congressmen?
How can I miss you if you don't go away?
How come pizza gets to your house faster than the police?
How come this jacket they gave me doesn't have sleeves?
How do we know you really have those magic powers?
How do we know you're the *real* Angel of Death?
How do you call a *very* large cat wearing a rising-sun headband?
How do you pronounce my name?   With reverence.
How many cat skeletons does it take to fill a tree?
How the hell does this thing work?
How will banning *MY* firearms reduce crime?
How's "Nuke 'em All!" for strategy?
However subtle the wizard; a knife in the back will cramp his style.
Human Being: An ingenious assembly of portable plumbing.
Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
Hunting is no fun when the rabbit has the gun.
Hush boy, you'll annoy the Overlords.
Hydrogen bombs are great party gags.
I *could* be arguing in my spare time.
I *told* the Muse I'm not a masochist, so why is the whip out again?
I abstain from wine, women and song; mostly song.
I Almost Saw Elvis - Then My Shovel Broke...
I always poach my Rats...lowers the cholesterol...
I always use the goodest English.
I am =NOT= illiterate.  I know who my parents are.
I am a man more sinned against than sinning. - King Lear
I am a mental tourist,  my mind wanders.
I am committed--or should be.
I am firm. You're stubborn. He's pigheaded.
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
I am Ingnio Montoya. You stole my tagline. Prepare to die.
I am not a human! I am an animal! er...wait..
I am not an animal!  I am ... well, not an animal.
I am NOT anthropomorphic!  Now get off my tail...
I am not antisocial, I'm just not real friendly...
I am not arguing with you, I'm telling you.
I am not conceited! I just hate mortals.
I am not young enough to know everything...
I am the neurosis that requires a $500-an-hour shrink!
I am the terror that posts in the night.
I am their leader, which way did they go?
I am tolerant of your (fruitcake) beliefs
I am tolerant of your (pagan) beliefs.
I am torn by conflicting apathies.
I became a power user, I bought 30 unformatted floppies.
I believe in the infliction of pain for the sake of art.
I beta test co unication softwFEL87=\d+A$ NO CARRIER
I came, I saw, I had no idea what was going on, so I left
I can count even higher if I take my shoes off.
I can walk on water, but I stagger on alcohol.
I can walk on water...........I stagger on alcohol.
I can't be stupid, I completed third grade!
I CAN'T go to h*ll, they don't want me.
I carry a gun 4 days a week.  You guess which 4.
I couldn't repair the brakes, so I made your horn louder.
I cut it three times and it's still too short!
I debug with a magnet.
I didn't create reality...I'm just trapped in it!
I didn't know it was impossible when I did it.
I didn't wake up grouchy... I let her sleep.
I dislike killing my guests - Steven Brust
I do a weekly format In case I accidently backup c drive.
I do everything better when I'm naked.
I do whatever my Rice Crispies tell me to do.
I don't do jogging, it makes my beer all foamy
I don't do Windows. But OS/2 does. Very well.
I don't get mad...I just delete your COMMAND.COM
I don't have a problem with GOD, it's his FAN CLUB I hate
I don't have a solution, but I do admire the problem.
I don't have any solution, but I admire the problem.
I don't know what I like, but I know what art is.
I don't like violence but I'm very good at it
I don't recall running for this office.
I don't suffer from mental illness...I enjoy it!!!
I don't think Mr. Ranger is gonna like this, Yogi.
I Don't Wanna Overthrow the Govt, I Wanna Fire'em.!!
I don't want more, I want it all!
I Don't Want The World, I Just Want Your Half.
I Don't Want The World, I want the universe.
I don't want to be literate, I just want to program.
I donated my cat to the local Chinese restaurant.
I escaped from a political correction facility...
I even tried to reformat it, but still can't read my file
I fart in your general direction! -John Cleese
I feel a random act of violence coming on...
I FELT something was wrong. Multitasking causes schizophrenia.
I found my x-girlfriend in a find-a-fiend add.
I gave her the ring, she gave me the finger.
I get the news I need on the weather report.
I got a life once.  Traded it in for a bigger hard disk.
I had a cat once.  Tasted like chicken.
I had a vile comment once, but it escaped  -Saint
I had one just like it.... only different.
I harbor no grudges, only angry memories.
I hate the way he says "Interesting Problem."
I have a 486, but a .357 is much faster.
I have a black belt in haiku.
I have a firm grip on reality.  Now I can strangle it.
I have a rock garden.  Last week three of them died.
I have an interesting way of my words structuring.
I have an OS/2 suit - It's multithreaded.
I have my priorities straight-it's the demands that are screwed up.
I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm doing it well.
I have seen the evidence.  I want DIFFERENT evidence...
I have the heart of a young boy - in a jar on my desk.
I have the simplest of tastes. The best is satisfactory.
I haven't killed anyone yet. Help me keep it that way.
I hear that it's Tourist Season in Florida.
I hunt flies with a sledge hammer....and get em!!!
I intend to live long enough to see my enemies die.
I just forgot my whole philosophy of life!!!
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
I just tested out my pitbull. Ever heard a mime scream?
I know so little, but I know it fluently.
I like os2 as much as the next fanatic!
I like to leave messages *before* the beep.
I like to skate on the other side of the ice.
I like to throw boomerangs to dogs.
I live in a quiet neighborhood, they use silencers
I live on good soup, not on fine words. - Moliere
I live to serve the public. How'd you like to be cooked?
I Love Animals......They're Delicious!
I love cats.  On a good night, I can eat 5 or 6 of 'em...
I love standards! Such a variety to choose from!
I love the smell of napalm in the morning!
I love the sound of silence. Say what's on your mind.
I love you, you love me, Barney ate my fa-mi-ly...
I M a tru beleever in hour edukashun sistum.
I may be wrong, but I'm not uncertain.
I may have my faults but being wrong isn't one of them.
I may not always be NICE, but I'm always GOOD.  }}}:)
I may not be smart, but I can lift heavy things.
I may work slow, but I do poor work
I need someone really bad.  Are you really bad?
I never liked crayons much. They just don't have any flavor at all.
I never make stupid mistakes.  Only very, very clever ones.
I never said I was perfect, but I never denied it!
I nows is graadiated froum Hi Skule.
I offer you your enemies.
I only drink to make other people seem interesting
I only drink when I'm alone or with someone.
I Only See In Infrared.
I passed my ethics course.  I cheated, of course...
I played poker w/ tarot cards-got a flush & 5 people died
I procrastinate, therefore I will be.
I program like a MAN. I use COPY CON PROGRAM.EXE.
I put hard wood floors over carpeting.
I put on women's clothing, And hang around in bars
I quit drinking/smoking/&sex once.Very boring 15mins.
I refuse a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
I refuse to answer on the grounds..in the air maybe...
I refuse to go to a doctor who believes in reincarnation.
I run stop signs; I don't believe what I read.
I said Vulcan MIND meld, not MIME meld. Sorry, Marcel....
I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it.
I saw Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
I saw this in a cartoon once, but I think I can do it...
I saw what you did, and would like your phone #.
I see that your second lobotomy finally took hold.
I see your .44 and raise you a GAU-8A.
I should have known, you'd bid me farewell
I shpeak seeks different langwages, Eenlish da bast.
I stepped on a Tetanus needle today..... now what?
I still miss my exwife, but my aim is getting better...
I still Miss my wife. But with this new laser Sight...
I stink, therefore I'm Spam.
I SWEAR I thought she was 18!
I think ... therefore I am overqualified.
I think he's from the shallow end of the gene pool.
I think I'll wait for the 80986.
I think.                 Therefore I am DANGEROUS.
I think.... therefore I am conservative.
I thought you would've ducked....        honest.
I toast...therefore I am.
I tried being reasonable once, I didn't like it.
I tried switching to gum but couldn't keep it lit.
I tried to contain myself, but I escaped.
I turned in Schroedinger for Animal Cruelty...
I used to be a coyote, but I'm alright nooow!
I used to be sane once, didn't care for it much...
I used to jog, but the ice kept falling out of my glass
I used to play with my food, but I kept losing...
I want to live forever, and so far so good.
I was a dirty young man - I haven't changed.
I was gonna be a barber but neurosurgery pays better.
I was there.  I saw it happen.  You can trust me.
I was walking on water, or was that *under* water?
I went mad once.  Did me a world of good.
I went to court for a parking ticket.  I pleaded insanity
I will not squeak chalk. (with appropriate squeaks)
I wish I had a lower IQ so I could enjoy your company!
I wish my brain had expansion slots.
I wish scripts would do what I think I tell them
I wish you wouldn't sharpen your teeth when you say that.
I would have got away with it if it wasn't for those meddling kids!!
I would say more,but I'mălimited to only 57 characters here.
I would strongly oppose apathy, if I cared...
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
I'd give you a piece of my mind, but I'm on the last one.
I'd love to, but I'm taking punk totem pole carving.
I'd love to, but my bathroom tiles need grouting.
I'd offer everyone a Twinkie, but I'm not the host.
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll bring the Chtorr:  you bring the barbeque sauce.
I'll have one brain on drugs with bacon and toast.
I'll have what the guy on the floor is having.
I'll never forget you -- you're too weird.
I'll never get off this planet.
I'll play fair if I get to make up the rules
I'm a belligerent omnivore -- I eat vegetarians.
I'm a modemer & I'm OK, I post all night & I sleep all day.
I'm a paranoid hypochondriac enamored with reality.
I'm a peaceful man.  I vote to kill all weapon makers.
I'm a perfectionist with other people's work.
I'm a very modest man, and damned proud of it.
I'm an alien, an illegal alien!
I'm an anti-solipsist: everyone/thing exists except me.
I'm an antisolipsist: Everybody exists except me
I'm an Englishman in New York!
I'm an OS/2 developer...I don't NEED a life!
I'm another roadkill on the Information Superhighway.
I'm BETA testing my girlfriend. Bug report follows
I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing.
I'm easy to please as long as I get my way.
I'm evil... I *LIKE* being evil...
I'm from the government. I'm here to help you.
I'm going to live forever!...or die trying.
I'm growing older, but not up.....
I'm happiest when I'm doing the cooking.
I'm having an out of money experience.
I'm having this tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle
I'm heavily armed, easily bored & off my medication...
I'm heavily armed, easily upset, and off the medication.
I'm immortal.  I'm bored.  Let's party.
I'm just here for moral support. . . ignore the gun.
I'm not a complete idiot - several parts are missing.
I'm not a mercenary; killing is more of a hobby with me.
I'm not a shyster, I'm a QUACK.
I'm NOT a vampire - I just eat like one...
I'm not arrogant, I'm just better than you.
I'm not Canadian although I tend to like their bacon.
I'm not crazy..I just have a unique sense of reality.
I'm not hostile! I'll kill the #%! that said that!
I'm not insane; Just pschologically challenged.
I'm not lost, I'm locationally challenged.
I'm not nearly as think as you confused I am.
I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?
I'm not perfect. (but my inner self is)
I'm not perfect. (but my subconcious is)
I'm not prejudiced; I hate everybody
I'm not stupid, I'm just "politically correct."
I'm not stupid, I'm not expendable, and I'm not going!
I'm on top of the world. To bad there's no air here.
I'm out of bed and dressed.  What more do you want?
I'm part Scotch -- my other part's water.
I'm perfect, other people just screw up my plans.
I'm practicing assertiveness.  Do you think that's okay?
I'm pretty cool, Beavis, but I can't change the future...
I'm really imprinted with the quality of this conference.
I'm scared of the dark.. the government's in it.
I'm Seymour Cash of the law firm Dowie, Screwem, & Howe
I'm sorry, but my opinion is ROM burned.
I'm sorry, you are not cleared for that information.
I'm spending a year dead for tax purposes.
I'm The Best at what I do, and what I do isn't very nice.
I'm the creature that goes bump in the night.
I'm the person your mother warned you about
I'm weird, but around here it's barely noticeable.
I've already told you more than I know.
I've been pursuing a path of alternate reality
I've committed adultery in my heart many times
I've lost my sense of direction; which way to the bar?
I, myself, AM strange and unusual...
Idiocy is an inbred genetic trait of all politicians.
Idiot (id-ee-it) n.-> One who disagrees with me.
If a bear is chasing you please don't run this way.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
If a thing is worth doing at all, it's worth doing badly.
If anything -can't- go wrong, it will.
If At First You Don't Succeed Ignore The Docs
If at first you don't succeed, destroy the evidence.
If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.
If at first you don't succeed, put it out for beta test
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you...
If at first you don't succeed, tell her another lie.
If at first you don't succeed, that means you're average. ţ
If at first you don't succeed, work for Microsoft.
If at first you don't succeed, you must be a programmer.
If at first you don't suceed, you fail.
If everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane
If God wanted us to go METRIC Jesus would've had 10 disciples not 12.
If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
If I knew how to spell, I could use a dictionary.
If I melt dry ice, I can go swimming without getting wet.
If I offend thee...          ...tough!
If I want your opinion I'll give it to you.
If I want your opinion, I'll read your entrails.
If I wanted flames, I'd sell my soul to the Devil.
If idiots could fly, this would be an airport.
If ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise.
If it ain't broke yet, let me have a shot at it.
If it ain't broke, hit it harder.
If it ain't broken, play with it till it is.
If it doesn't work, change the documentation.
If it doesn't work, it doesn't matter how fast it doesn't work.
If it don't mean a thing, it ain't information. <Fez,Synners>
If it isn't broken, I can fix it.
If it jams, force it...If it breaks, it needed replacing.
If it moves shoot it, when its dead paint it green.
If it screams, it's not food.........yet.
If it walks out of your refrigerator, LET IT GO!
If it works, something went wrong.
If it's glowing, don't eat it...
If it's not on fire, it's a software problem.
If its Tourist Season, why can't we shoot 'em ???
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
If people can't communicate, they could at least shut up.
If she won't live forever, then why give her a diamond?
If someone shoots me, I get to keep the bullet.
If stupidity was a survival value, he would live forever!
If stupidity was painful, then people would get help.
If the enemy is in range, SO ARE YOU.
If the enemy is within range, so are you.
If the facts are against you, argue the law.
If the law is against you, argue the facts.
If the mail wants me so badly, _it_ can walk to _me_.
If they catch us we're dead."    "I've been dead before."
If they put your brain in a bird, it would fly backward.
If they're waving, where's the rest of their fingers?
If thine enemy offend thee, give his child a drum.
If this isn't war, why is CNN massing on the border?
If this was a real emergency, you'd've been trampled
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
If users can't read the manual, give them the source code
If Version 1.0 works someone goofed...
If we left the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy!
If wishes were horses, beggars would be shoveling manure.
If ya can't say anything nice, sit by me.
If you ain't making waves, you ain't kicking hard enough.
If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
If you call me insane again, I'll eat your other eye too.
If you can count your money, then you don't have enough
If you can't fix it call it a feature.
If you can't laugh at yourself, I'll laugh at you......
If you can't make fun of your friends ... what good are they?
If you can't make fun of yourself, give me a call!
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
If you don't bet, you can't win. - Heinlein
If you don't care where you are, then you can't get lost.
If you don't like how I drive, get off the sidewalk!
If you don't like my facts, make up your own.
If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself!
If you don't like the Graffiti here, don't order Italian!
If You Don't Think Women Are Explosive... Drop One.
If you drink, don't drive.  Don't even putt.
If you find this message offensive then you get my drift
If you hit every time, the target's too near.
If you leave the room, you're elected.
If you want it done right, forget Microsoft.
If you were an Armadillo, you'd worship trees, too!
If you're happy and you know it clank your chains
If you're on the cutting edge, expect to bleed.
If you're trying to drive me crazy, you're too late.
Ifyoucanreadthis,youspendtoomuchtimefiguringouttaglines.
Ignorance won't kill you, but it makes you sweat a lot.
ILLITERATE? Write for a free brochure...
Immortality is no excuse for not flossing.
Improve your IQ...eat gifted children!
In a nuclear war, all men will be cremated equal
In a sense, we have always lived in Ahnk-Morpork.
In a solemn ceremony, they giggle viciously.
In a vegetable garden, flowers are weeds.
In Arkansas, if you get a divorce, technically you're STILL cousins.
In CyberSpace everybody can hear you scream.
In Cyberspace, no one wears a watch.
In DOS we trust, all others please crash.
In extreme circumstances, cautionary measures are always justified.
In handling a stinging insect, movevery slowly. - Heinlein
In life.....pain is mandatory....misery is optional
In space...no one can hear you "Cha! Cha! Cha!"
In the beginning there was the Precambrian epoch.
In the country of the blind, the one-eyed men are kings.
In the end, everything is the same as it ever was.
Incorrigible punster - do not incorrige.
Inductive logic is much more difficult--but can produce new truths.- RAH
Infuriate the media: think for yourself.
Ingratitude, thou marble-hearted fool... - King Lear
Injustice anywhere threatens justice everywhere.
Inquiring minds wanna know. Intelligent minds don't care.
Insanity is fun if you do it right.
Insects really bug me.
Insert disk 5 of 4 and press any key to continue
Insert New Disk for Drive C: Press ENTER when ready.
Insert prong A into hole B and twist HARD!
Insert your favorite rude obnoxious offensive phrase here
Insomnia isn't anything to lose sleep over.
Install failed: Attempting to transfer virus to c:
Installation recommended (not included)
Instead here we are in a silence more eloquent...
Intelligence is the right arm of modern warfare.
Is it Progress when the cannibals use a fork?
Is nothing sacred? Great! When are worship services?
Is there supposed to be a lot of water down here?
Isn't that our pilot over there, kissing the ground?
It appears to make a driver mad if he misses you.
It doesn't work, but it looks pretty.
It is better to copualte than never. - Heinlein
It is better to light a flamethrower than curse the dark.
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also well armed.
It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It is when I struggled to be brief that I became obscure
It isn't really mine 'til I've modified it
It made a sound like someone was field-cleaning a badger.
It takes a long time to grow an old friend.
It takes a Real Man to sit indoors all day doing this.
It was supposed to be so easy.
It works better if you plug it in.
It works fine except when it's activated.
It's a chain saw. I always carry one for emergencies.
It's a dead man's party...Who could ask for more?
It's a great day for putting slinkies on an escalator.
It's a great place, and the drinks are cold!
It's a Satanic drug thing - You WOULDN'T understand...
It's all fun and games until the hard drive dies.
It's all psychobabble rap to me.
It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired. - RAH
It's cold outside...there's no kind of atmosphere...
It's easy to make Windows faster.  Just throw it harder.
It's great to do nothing and rest afterwards.
It's hard to RTFM when you can't find the FM..
It's hard to work in groups when you're omnipotent.
It's not 0 to 60 that counts... it's 85 to 55 that matters!
It's not a bug, it's an undocumented feature.
It's NOT kill the women and rape the men, it's...
It's not so much the bat, but the Cyborg swinging it....
It's not that life is so short, it's that you're dead for so
It's not the money I want, it's the stuff.
It's not the principle, it's the money.
It's not your imagination... we ARE against you.
It's nothing a warm-boot can't fix, I think
It's on that one, the 6th unlabeled floppy.
It's only my opinion, but it's better than yours.
It's so hard to find good vacuum tubes for my PC anymore.
It's working now; I don't want to break it by fixing it
JaLaPe Brand Ration's - Raw Meat that's great to eat!
Japan says your illiterate.
Jesus Saves  --at First National Bank
Jimmy Hoffa, call your office.
Joe's crematorium u kill'em we grill'em!
John Wayne's World:  Party time, Pilgrim.  -SLR
Join army: travel, meet interesting people & kill them!
Just 'cause it won't work; You think it's buggy.
Just a lowly conference participant; not a moderator.
Just another prisoner of gravity!!
Just climb in, and hang on. Open your eyes, if you dare...
Just don't tell the asylum you saw me here.
Just say NO to negativism.
Just sliding down the razor blade of life . . .
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the bitstream.
Kant's Categorical Imperative is too long for a tagline.
Keep honking...I'm reloading
Keep thy Tail Bushy and thine Eyes Bright,
Keep you're opinion to yourself. Spread mine around.
Keep your city clean...eat a pigeon.
Keyboard: A device for entering misteaks in a computer˙
Kill or starve.
Kill the extremists.
KILL the s.o.b. - THEN count to 10.
Kill What You Can't Understand.
Killing time takes practice.
Klingon DOS 6.0- DEL.COM; ERASE.COM; WIPE.COM; TRASH.EXE; BURN.BAT;
Knights errant spend their nights erring.
Knowledge itself is power. -- Francis Bacon
Knowledge rests not on truth alone, but upon error also.
Knowledge without common sense is folly.
LABEL NOT FOUND: go anywhere you like.
Lack of planning does not constitute an emergency.
Land of the Free, Home of the Unemployed.
Last one out of the coffin is a rotten corpse.
Lawyer: one who calls a 137-page document a brief.
Lawyer: the larval form of politician.
Lawyers should advertise on Emergency room ceilings.
Lawyers: the larval form of politicians.
Lay down all thought, surrender to the void...
Lead me not into temptation - unless there's money involved.  -SLR
Lead us not into temptation; we can find it ourselves.
Lead, Follow, or get the H*ll out of the way...
Left blank to annoy the moderator.
Lern two spel. Kull mee att wurc four fre hellp.
Let him who understands reckon the number of the Beast.
Let the meek inherit the earth, I want stars.
Let's get some beer and dynamite and go fishing.
Let's take a chance on living; before we die!
Let's you and him fight.
Liberal (n): Anyone who disagrees with you.
Liberal censorship is hogwash.  I see no evide ...  NO CA
Liberals! Looks like we'll have to blast our way out!
Life and Liberty are safe...when congress is in recess.
Life being what it is, I dream of revenge
Life is a game, and money is how you keep score...
Life is an interruption in entropy.
Life is complex:  It consists of real and imaginary parts
Life is like toilet paper; we panic as the end approaches.
Life sucks and then you marry one who won't.
Life's a b*tch...then you are reincarnated.
Life.  It's not just a bowl of cereal anymore.
Life: what happens while you're making other plans.
Limit Congressmen to 2 terms - 1 in Congress, 1 in Jail!
Line Noise Brought to You By an I.R.S. Phone Tap
Listen to sermon, THEN eat missionary!
Listen you malfunctioning mess of microchips......
Little did he know, but I was a master of the pugil...
Live by the sword, die by the longbow.
Living: The best demonstration of victory over mortality.
Logic is a way of going wrong with confidence.
Logic is logic. That's all I say." Holmes
Logic: 1+1= 11, 2+2= 22, 3+3=6
Loitering with intent to hesitate.
Long live conference hosts ... so they can suffer longer.
Longer life through superior firepower.
Longer than lumber and broader than a bench.
Look unimportant - The enemy may be low on ammo
Looks like I picked a bad year to stop sniffing glue.
Lots of cute, furry animals killed to make this tagline.
LOTUS - Let Only The Users Suffer
Love is deaf as well as blind... and walks with a limp.  -SLR
Love is grand...  Divorce is twenty grand...
Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.
Love your country, but fear the government.
Love your neighbour, but don't get caught.
LSD melts in your mind not in your hands.
LSD melts your mind, not in your hand.
LSD: Virtual Reality without the expensive hardware!
Lucas refrigerators:  Why the British drink warm beer.
Lunatic asylum: where optimism most flourishes.
Mac screen message: "Like, dude, something went wrong."
Macintosh - Computer /w training wheels you can't remove.
MACs = Snobby-Expensive-User-Friendly computers
Mad at your neighbor?  Buy his kid a drum!
Madness takes it's toll; please have exact change.
Mafia DOS: "Thisa you lasta chance [Y/N]?"
Magicians are a vanishing species.
Mail not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic (B)lame sysop.
Make a bold fashion statement: Get Naked.
Make friends with SysOps: Page them at 3am.
Make it as simple as possible, but no simpler.
Make my day, kill a GUI today.
Make my sushi medium rare
Malice:merely stupidity raised to a higher power.
Man is a god in ruins.  -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Man looks into the abyss, and sees himself.
Man made Booze.  God made Grass.  Who do you trust?
Man of Steel hates industrial electromagnets.
Man often abolishes God; fortunately God is more tolerant
Man with forked tongue has no need for chopsticks.
Man,the missing link between apes and human beings
Mandatory tagline affixed in accordance with rule 3, sec A, par 2.
Manuals come out, after all possible keystrokes fail.
Marriage enders: You propose, we dispose.
Marriage is a rocky road when the attendents get stoned.
Marriage is not a word but a sentence.
Marriage is ok, but I wouldn't recommend it for singles
Marriage?  No thanks, I don't breed well in captivity.
Married alive -- a fate worse than death.
Mars Needs Bovines
Mary had a little lamb, some white wine, and a salad.
Mason-Dixon: Line that separates y'all from youse-
Math illiteracy affects eight out of every five people.
Math Problems?  Call 1-800-10x(24+13)-(64-16)/2 36x2.
MAXIMUM UNPLEASANT STIMULI!!!
Me opinionated? . . . Not on your life pig!
Me use the manual?  Do I look like a sissy to you?
Me, indecisive?  I don't think I am, do you?
Me...a skeptic?  I trust you have proof.
Medical definition: Dilate. To live too long
MEDICAL STAFF: A doctor's cane.
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss...
Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Kenders.
Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves!
Memory parity interrupt at 367A:64DF Self-Destruct 5 sec.
Men who believe absurdities will commit atrocities -Voltaire
Mental compatability not covered by warranty.
Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
Mere life is not victory, mere death is not defeat.
Message sent. Destroy immediately upon receipt.
Messiah Complex? Me?  Well, let me just sayeth unto you......
Mickey Mouse wears an Al Gore wristwatch.
Microbiology Lab: STAPH ONLY!
Microsoft Slogan..."McDoublespace..... Over 30 Billion crashed..."
Microsoft Windows - proof that P.T. Barnum was correct.
Microsoft:  Making it easier... to switch to OS/2!
Microsoft: Making it all. Make sense?
MilliHelen: Amount of Beauty Needed to Launch One Ship
Millions of sperm and _that_ one got through.  Sigh.
Milton's 1st Law: Anything can be used as a hammer.
Mind if I clean my fly swatter over your soup?
Mmm mmm good; Cream of Spotted Owl Soup, yum
Mmmmmm!  A problem with grammar have I, yes!  -- Yoda
MODEM - M_onumentally O_verpriced D_ata E_ating M_achine
Modem: A great deterrent to phone solicitors
Moderator (n): see also god, dictator, egotist, oppressor
Modesty Becomes You. Try It More Often.
Monday is an awful way to spend one seventh of your life.
Mondays are a rotten way to spend 1/7th of your life.
Money can't buy happiness, but it does quiet the nerves.
Money is truthful. If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.- RAH
Monogamous and monotonous are synonymous.
Monolith Moscow Cemetery: "My God, it's full of czars!"
Monotheism: a gift from the gods
Morale improved, but now I ENJOY floggings!
Morbid: Burying the body, and then visiting weekly.
More fun than @TO@ should be allowed.
More than just a book--it's a major piece of torture.
Morgue, you stab'em, we slab'em!
Mosquito: Designed by God to make flies seem better.
Most "scientists" are bottle washers and button sorters. - Heinlein
Most allies must be watched just like the enemy.
Most have good aims in life, but few pull the trigger.
Most people make sense, I'm not one of them.
Most political jokes get elected
Multitasking - Twice the mistakes in half the time.
Multitasking = screwing up several things at once.
Murphy didn't come close to real trouble.
Murphy's rule of combat: Incoming fire has right of way.
Murphy's:  All constants are variables!
MUST...DESTROY...MANKIND.......oops! Time for lunch!
My best feature?  I would say my overwhelming humility...
My boss says I'm going to be famous, he says I'm history.
My computer NEVER loc
My demand curves are *always* upward sloping....
My dog loves cats! He'll eat as many as he can catch!
My ego's bigger than your ego...<sneer>...
My girlfriend said I never listen to her, or something.
My guru told me there'd be lifetimes like this.
My horse is the one that just broke its leg and fell on the jockey.
My infinity is bigger than yours.
My last original thought died of loneliness.
My life is in your hands...  What do you mean, "oops"?
My mind is a scary place, I try not to go there alone.
My mind isn't always in the gutter - sometimes it comes out to feed.
My Mind's like a steel trap: Rusty and Unhinged.
My mistakes are purely erroneous.
My one regret in life is that I'm not someone else
My opinions are my own; mistakes are the computer's fault
My opinions are not those of my employer
My other computer is a TRS-80 Model 4.
My other sentient killing machine is a BOLO
My other tagline's a Rolex...
My psychiatrist told me "Maybe life isn't for everyone"
My reality check just bounced.
My ship came in but unfortunatly it was the flying dutchmen.
My system will resolve an infinite loop in 3 millisec.
My V32bs fx/mdm wrks jst fne wthot a 1550 bffrd URT
My Wife wishes I drank or chased women like other men!
My wife's other car is a broomstick.
Name: John Doe  Phone:222-2222  Sex:Not lately
Natural laws have no pity. - Heinlein
Natural Selection works ... if you let it.
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
Necrophilia means never having to say... well, anything...
Neurotoxin Lite! Tastes great. Less drooling.
Never accept a drink from a urologist.
Never argue with a skunk, mule, woman, or SysOp...
Never assume conspiracy when stupidity will explain it.
Never assume.  It makes an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
Never attribute to malice that which may be explained by stupidity.
Never board a plane whose flight number is 5050!
Never buy wine from a guy with purple feet.
Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.
Never eat a hedgehog without peeling it first.
Never enough time, unless you're serving it.
Never fight ugly people, 'cause they have nothing to lose
Never frighten a little man, he'll kill you. - Heinlein
Never give a gun to ducks.
Never go to a cyberpunk play when the review says "Riotous."
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight instead.
Never hit a man when he's down - always kick him.
Never hit a man with glasses.  Use your fist.
Never judge a man by his taglines.
Never laugh at live dragons.
Never lean forward to push an invisible object.
Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.
Never let a machine know you're in a hurry.
Never let an inanimate object defeat you.
Never let your dragon overeat!
Never lick a gift horse in the mouth.
Never mind the oxygen.  This man's a donor.
Never mind the star - get those camels off the lawn!
Never mistake endurance for hospitality.
Never pet a burning dog.
Never play Global War with someone named after a state.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can ignore entirely.
Never send a monster to do the work of an evil scientist.
Never show up at a gun fight with a knife
Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
Never take a beer to a job interview.
Never tell them what you wouldn't want to do.
Never test for an error you don't know how to handle.
Never trust a computer that smiles at you...
Never underestimate a barbarian knucklewalker.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. - Heinlein
Never, ever, ever attempt to learn thermodynamics.
Never, ever, pinch a sorceress on the butt.  <ribbit>
New Lurker Conference! Join in and disappear...
new oxymoron: final beta
Next time I send a damn fool, I'll go myself...Geez!
Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.
No amount of careful planning will ever replace dumb luck
No bathroom? Just go boldly where no one has gone before.
No battle plan survives contact with the enemy
No Brain, No Pain.
NO CARRIER...but I've got 2 destroyers and a frigate
No cute, furry animals killed to make this tagline.
No good deed ever goes unpunished.
No good deed goes unpunished - Mark Twain.
No man is free who is not master of himself.
No matter where you go, there you are....
NO MESSAGES FOUND. [H]it modem. [S]cream at fido gods. [Y]ell profanity
No One Is Ugly After 2:00 AM
No real reason for it; it just happens to be my policy.
No reason for it; it's just my policy.
No sense being pessimistic.  It wouldn't work anyway.
No trouble parking, I drive a forklift...
No uninteresting subjects, just uninterested people.
No wanna work.  Wanna bang on keyboard.˙
No, bartender, I said I vanted a BLOOD lite!
No, I never read the documentation.
No, I'm not an elitist.  Why do you ask, peasant?
No, no, not "born again."  I said, I was into PORN again.
No, really.  Where did you get the zombie slime?
Noble deeds that are concealed are most esteemed.
Nobody ever bet too much on a winning horse.
None are so blind as those who will not see.
North East Breakfast: A cuppa coffee and a cigarette.
Not a computer nerd; merely a techno-weenie.
not after devouring so many maidens of the valley.
Not all men are fools, some are bachelors.
Not broke, merely under-funded.
Not now ... I have to go mow the laundry.
Not-so-famous Fraternities: I Phelta Thi, Tappa Kegga Bru
Nothing can go wrong(clik)go wrong(clik)go wro..
Nothing is 100% certain, bug-free, or IBM compatible
Nothing is final.  Except me, of course. <Death, "Sourcery">
Nothing is so smiple that it can't get screwed up.
Nothing like a bribe to get things rolling.
Nothing wrong w/ this program a strong magnet can't cure.
Nothing's foolproof.  Idiots are too ingenious.
Nothing's impossible for those who don't have to do it.
Nothing: Often a good thing to do & a clever thing to say
Now abusing OS/2 2.1
Now and then an innocent man becomes a senator.
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the Legislature
Now in new great-tasting Grape and Watermelon flavor.
Now where did I put that fire extinguisher?
NT - "The carrot in front of the donkey" - J Dvorak
Nuke 'em til they glow... shoot 'em in the dark!
Number of phone rings = number of steps from commode -1
O Lord, protect me from those to whom You speak directly!...
Objection, your Honour! My client is an idiot!
Of all the people I have met, you are certainly one.
Of all the things I've lost...I miss my mind the most.
Of course I can cook, but I never do it on the 1st date!
Of course I turned, I hit you didn't I?
Of course I'll pay for that one.  Check okay?
Of course it's safe.  Go on in, I'll be right behind you.
Of course it's safe. Go in, I'll be right behind you.
Of course, coffee *is* one of the major vitamins
Often it's fatal to live too long
Oh freddled gruntbuggly, thy micturations are to me ...
Oh what a Grand Universe we live in....
Oh, excuse me, were those your panties?
Oh, I'm sorry, were the voices in my head bothering you?
Oh, it's on page 732 of the docs, paragraph 3, section D1
Oh, pardon me, was that *your* culture? So sorry.
Ok Space Cadets! Prepare to hurtle through the cosmos!
OK, I pulled the pin. Now what? Hey, where're you going?
OK, I'm weird! But I'm saving up to be eccentric.
OK, I've pulled the pin. Now what ? Where are you going ?
OK-give me ONE good reason why I can't have it both ways.
Old enough to know better, young enough not to care!
Old is when your back goes out more often than you do.
Old soldiers never die...young ones do.
On a clear disk you can seek forever
On Fidonet, nobody knows you're naked.
On one condition -- that it leads to extreme violence!
On the day of the dead, when the year too dies...
Once again, truth and American technology defeat Bill.
Once again, truth and American technology defeat Satan.
Once in a while, I screw up and do something right.
Once you pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is no longer a friend.
One atom bomb can ruin your whole day
One golden glance of what should be
One good turn is usually enough to get a person lost.
One man's Windows are another man's walls.
One more day like today and I'll kill you too.
One murder makes a villian, millions a hero -B Porteus
One nation under God; with liberty, fries & a Coke to go.
One ring to rule them all...
One sword at least thy rights shall guard,
One thing about pain: it proves you're alive.
Online?  Good, hit Alt-H for FREE Unlimited Access !
Only 19,999 lines of C++ to my next ski trip...
Only a lawyer calls a 10,000 word document a "brief".
Only a liberal could coin a word such as "undertaxed."
Only lemmings jump to unknown conclusions.
Only the educated are free: Some Greek guy.
Oops, gotta go feed the dragon.
Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally
Operating at a higher level - OS/2 v2.1
Operator error (E)xecute (T)rain (S)end Home
Operator! Trace this call and tell me where I am.
OPINIONS?  I have lots. Which one would you like?
Optimism is profoundly depressing.
Or time will grind you down to dust again...
Originality is the art of concealing your sources
OS/2 - because 32 bits are terrible things to waste.
OS/2 - The only true 100% FAT free operating system.
OS/2 fixes broken windows
OS/2!  Anything else is just DOS.
OS/2: Windows with bullet-proof glass.
OS/2: Your brain.  Windows: Your brain on drugs.
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?
Our swords shall play the orators for us.
Our world is like a cactus except the pricks are inside.
Page your sysop at 3am for Free Prizes!
Pain -- Finally something we can depend on.
Paint it Octarine: the color of magic.
Paranoia is just a heightened sense of awareness.
Pardon me if not every "i" is crossed and "t" dotted...
Pardon my driving; I'm trying to reload.
Pardon my existence and I might pardon yours.
Path = 'down there a ways and to the left'
Patience and time do more than strength or passion.
Patience is a virtue possessed by few men and no women˙
Patience-A Virtue That Carries A Lot Of Wait
PATROL CAR BUMPERSTICKER:  Attitudes adjusted, while you wait.
Paul Harvey fans always have a good day
Paused: enter any 12-digit prime number to continue
PCBackup: 1 of 1362 disks.
PCs rule 1001111 1001011
Pedestrian:  Someone who found a place to park.
Pedestrian: The most approachable chap in the world.
People say I'm apathetic, but I don't care.
People say I'm indecisive.  Am I?  I don't know.
Perhaps I should take up golf instead?
Personal beliefs become trivial when reality intrudes...
Personals:"Mormon seeks wife, must get along with others"
Philosophy is for people who can't form their own opinions.  -SLR
Phoneco.sys corrupted-recommend competitive market.
Pick two: 1)Fast 2)Right 3)Cheap 4)Windows (counts as 2)
Pioneers are the ones with the arrows in their backs.
PKunZIP V56.7 FAST! Exploding Universe->>CRC-@ error
Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.- RAH
Plasma is another matter
Played poker w/tarot cards.  Got a flush & 5 people died!
Please excuse me. I'm one of the fatigue impaired.
Please stand by, depressurization begins in 15 seconds.
Plunk your magic twanger Froggy...
Polite Virus: Sorry to interrupt, but I need to format...
Political Correctness: marketing term for mind contral.
Politicians aren't born, they are excreted. (Cicero)
Politics: Passing the buck or passing the doe.
Politics:Root(s):[a]Poly-Many [b]Tics-Bloodsuckers
Pornography: n. Things we enjoy but don't want anyone to know about.
Posted by a twisted mind behind a machine.
Power corrupts, but OS/2 is kinda neat.
Power corrupts.  Absolute power is kinda neat, though.
Power doesn't corrupt people, people corrupt power.
Power is an illusion; only stupidity is real.
Practice mirth control - used a conumdrum.
Practice mirth control..... always use a conundrum
Practice safe snuggle.  Make her wear socks to bed!
Pray for Bill Clinton (see Psalm 109:8)
Precinct toilet stolen... Police have nothing to go on.
Predestination was doomed from the start.
Preserve wildlife...pickle a squirrel today.
President Clinton --- The Eddie Haskel of politics.
Press <CTRL>-<ALT>-<DEL> to continue ...
Press <CTRL>-<ALT>-<DEL> to store all new data:
Press alt-H to continue, then Y if applicable.
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit
Press SPACEBAR once to quit or twice to save changes
Press to test. <click> Release to detonate...
Press [ESC] to detonate or any other key to explode
Prevent Messes-Cover Hamster before Microwaving
Problems? No, I LIKE my foot there.
Profanity, the language computerists know.
Professor: a textbook wired for sound.
Programmer (n): One who makes salesman's lies come true.
Programming Dept.: Mistakes made while you wait.
Prosecutors will be violated.
Provider of fine voodoo productions..... ë
Prune Juice . . . The drink of warriors!
Pscyhos R Us
Psychiatry: The study of the ID by the ODD.
Psychic Convention cancelled due to unforeseen problems
Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots.
Psychoses are red, Melancholia's blue, I'm Schizo...you?
Pull once to eject... twice to abort ejection.
Pull trigger repeatedly until problem dissapears
Puns are bad, but poetry is verse.
Put Lawyers on the ETHICS COMMITTEE, for BALANCE
Put the straightjacket over his mouth.  Trust me.
QEMM Exception #13: [L]ockup, [L]ockup, or [L]ockup?
QUICK! Hand me the cat; the cherry bomb's lit!
Quick, easy, enlightenment; Just axe for it.
Quoth the Raven, "Eat My Shorts."
Radical: Anyone whose opinion differs from ours.
Radioactive Halibut will make fission chips
RADIOACTIVE: if you can read this you're sterile
Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down.
Read Books And Repeat Quotations.
Real programmers innovate, others LITIGATE !
REAL programmers use "COPY CON PROGRAM.EXE"
Real Trekkers work out at the He's Dead Gym
Real women don't deflate when you bite them.
Reality is a constant intrusion on my dreams.
Reality Is An Illusion Caused By Lack Of Acid
Reality is an illusion: men are only the dreams of gods.
Reality is an obstacle to hallucination.
Reality is for those people who have no grasp of fantasy.
Reality is for those who can't face fantasy.
Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.
Reality: a fantasy gone wrong, dreadfully wrong!!!
Reality: an illusion produced by an alcohol deficiency.
Reality:a crutch for those who can't handle drugs.
Really honey, I NEED 10 megawatts for it.
Real_men_don't_need_spacebars.
Red meat is good for you; fuzzy green-blue meat is bad.
Redneck marriage proposal:.........YER WHUT!!??????
Relativity all depends on how you look at it.
Religion keeps the poor from murdering the rich.
Religious error: (A)tone, (R)epent, (I)mmolate?
REMEMBER that the only proper way to exit a door is ALT-H
Remember: Scan all files for viru(+(+(&*^)6075$%^&$
Remember: USER is a four letter word.
Reports of my being alive and well are grossly exagerated
Reputation:  what others are not thinking about you.
Research has found that research causes cancer in mice.
Retreat h*ll! We're just fighting in another direction!
Revenge is a dish best served....with tangy Miracle Whip!
Reward for a job well done: more work
Right theory, wrong universe
Right, mate, I'll just throw another Ken on the Barbie!
Road Kill Cafe - Today's Special: Swirl of Squirrel
Road Kill Cafe: new meaning for "fresh off the grill."
Robert A. Heinlein memorial taglein.
Rosanne Barr: proof that mankind is troubled
RTFM?  -  Nah, call the author at home!
Rumour: NT means Not Tested
Run for shelter in these golden years
Sacred cows make better hamburgers. -Graffiti
Sacred Cows make good hamburgers.
Safety needle:  pointless, isn't it?
Salvador Dali for Coca Cola: It's surreal thing.
SAPFU -- Surpassing All Previous Foul Ups.
Saudi Arabia, A country where the word "DUCK" is a Verb.
Save a flag - Burn a protester
Save a tree, eat a beaver!
Save Georgia's economy...Eat more canned Possum!
Save time - live several lives at once.
Save toilet paper.  Use the other side.
Say something nice to everyone today...drive them crazy.
Scandal is juicy gossip made tedious by morality.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
Science Fiction: So fun it ought to be illegal or fattening or sumfin'`
Science is truth -- don't be misled by facts.
Screw the company, those first 20 minutes belong to you.
Scripts, the thinking man's route to insanity.
Second star to the right and straight on 'til morning
Secrecy is the beginning of tyranny. - Heinlein
Secret revealed: Press CONTROL-ALT-DEL for SysOp Access!
Sects! Sects! Sects! Is that all Monks think about?
See ya in the chronostream, Time Jockey!
sEe! I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet!!!
Send $20.00 in small unmarked electrons.
send moneySUBLIMINALsend moneyTAGLINEsend money
Send Monopoly money to your favorite TV Evangelist.
Send more tourists..... the last ones were delicious!
Seriousness is the very next step to being dull.
Set.  Spike.  Dig.  I do it in the sand.
Sex ain't dirty.. it's slippery!
Shall I scream? Let's scream together.   -SLR
Share and Enjoy. (or - Go stick your head in a pig)
Sharks don't eat lawyers. Professional Courtesy.
She said "Have a nice day", but I had other plans.
She turned me into a newt! ....well, I got better....
She won't last forever, so why buy her a diamond?
She's dead, Jim. But hell, she was like that in the sack
She's the bargain hunter.  I just carry the ammunition.
Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.
Shoot Dr. @FIRST@ on sight and dissolve his body in acid.
Shoot first, and whatever you hit, call it the target.
Shoot first; answers aren't that important.
Shopping tip: Shoes are $.85 at bowling alleys.
Shouldn't you be doing something productive?
Show me a sane man.  I'll cure him for you.
Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor
Sign on the mortuary door: Remains to be Seen.
Sign outside brothel: "On Vacation. Beat it."
Silence cannot be misquoted.
Silence?  Oh no, it's the Attack Of The Mimes!
Simon says Stand! Simon says sit! Format your drive! HA! Gotcha!
Since I've used up my sick leave, I'm calling in dead.
Sinner: A stupid person who gets found out.
Sit dux sapienta- Let wisdom be your guide.
Sky diving, its good to the last drop.
Slaying foul maidens, rescuing fair dragons.
SLEDGE-O-MATIC: For life's most difficult problems.
Sleep: (noun), Short time between BBSing and work.
Sleep? I'm a Consultant!!
Slow the aging process: put it through Congress.
Slugs saut‚... a hors of a different d'oeuvre.
SMILE !  (makes people wonder what you're up to)
Smith & Wesson: The original point-and-click interface.
Smith & Wesson: The ultimate point & click user interface...
Snap, Crackle, Pop ....Darn I hope that was a fuse...
So he says to the Shapeshifter waitress, "Keep the change."
So I said to my one-legged wife, "Peg..."
So many books, so little time.
So many jerks, so few bullets...
So much time, so little to do (or something like that).
Society prepares the crime; the criminal commits it.
Software Troubleshooter - @TO@, w/44 Magnum
Software: What you boot.   Hardware: What you kick.
Solve the problems of the world: Vote anarchist.
Some days I look my best in a thick fog.
Some days you're the windshield, some days the bug.
Some nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.
Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill them.
Some settling may have occurred in shipping.
Some thoughts are best guillotined before actions result.
Somehow tuna doesn't taste the same without the dolphin.
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
Sometimes even fools make good suggestions.
Sometimes I wake up grouchy. Most times, I let her sleep.
Sometimes the depths of your ignorance amazes even me.
Sometimes you just have to say 'What the heck'
Sometimes you're a bug, sometimes a windshield
Sometimes you're a Kenworth, sometimes you're a possum.
Sometimes, I wish I could ARJ my wife...
Sometimes, the Dragon wins...
Sooner or later, I'll be free to leave the past behind.
Sorry Congressman... cash only.
Sorry, tomorrow is cancelled due to the lack of interest!
Southern DOS:  Y'all reckon? [yep/nope]
Sow dragons teeth, reap trouble.
Spaced Aliens:  Columbian drug lords in US.
SPAM - Squirrels, Possum, And Mice.
Speak softly and carry a meat cleaver.
Speed doesn't kill. Stopping very fast kills.
Speed is fine ... accuracy is final.   -- Wyatt Earp
Speed kills!  Switch to Windows ...
Speed kills; slow just infuriates...
Spindle & Mutilate - See if I care..
Spiritual Truth thru Superior Weapons
Squeeze Me Hard! I Work Better Under Pressure....
Squirrels: Rats with good P.R.
Stand aside:  I'm fluent in lunatic.
Stand under it, but don't let it lick you.
Start a download. Get a beer. Multitasking.
Stationary mice have bigger balls.
Statistics are no substitute for judgment.
Steven King, eat your heart out.
Strange fits of passion have I known;
Studies show that 51% of Americans are in the majority.
Success is just a matter of luck.  Ask any failure.
Success lies in achieving the top of the food chain
Sumo wrestling in the canoe of life.
Support medical examiners--die strangely.
Support NAFTA, export Clinton and Bore
Support nuclear families! The mutants are fun to watch!
Support OS/2: Show NT to your friends!
Support your constitutional right to arm bears.
Support your SysOp... Send your paycheck.
Sure you can trust the government... ask any Indian.
Sure, I stole them.  All of them, and I'm *PROUD* of it! HAHAHAHAHA!
Sure, it's embarrassing, but it's over quickly.
Sure, money talks.  All mine ever says is goodbye.
SURF NAKED: sharks hate to peel their food
Surrender now - before I have to offer you better terms.
Surrounded?  No, we're just in a target rich environment.
Survival Tip #2:  Never moon a werewolf.
Survival Tip #3: Never invite Cthulhu over for dinner.
Sushi: Known to the rest of the world as 'Bait'.
Swamp gas usually doesn't create sonic booms.
Swim nude.  Sharks hate to peel their food.
Synonym: A word used when you can't spell the first one.
SysOp ('sih sop) n. - The person laughing at your typing.
System error.  Strike any user to continue...
SYSTEM ERROR: place sacrifice on keyboard to continue.
SYSTEM FAILURE: PRESS F13 TO CONTINUE!
Tabloid: A newspaper with a permanent crime wave.
Taco Bell is *not* a mexican phone company
Tact is knowing how far to go in going too far.
Tact is knowing how far you can go too far.
Tact: Recalling a lady's birthday but forgetting her age.
Taglines: More interesting than the garbage above.
Take me not for what I seem, but for what I am.
Taking up collection to give Barney a one way ticket to hell.
Talk is cheap... till you hire a lawyer.
TANSTAAFL - There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch.
Target Shooting - Official Pastime of Nicaraugua
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed. - RAH
Teamwork is vital.  It gives you someone to blame.
Tech Support is Just A Busy Signal Away
Tech Support: Where is it when you need it?
TECHNICALITY:  Someone *ELSES* Constitutional rights..
Tell me, have you ever woken up and realized you were doomed?
Temporal distortion located around workplace clock.
Temporary suspension of disbelief is a wonderful thing.
Terror is also a form of communication.
Thank you for not discussing the outside world.
Thank you for not mooning your checkout girl.
That IS a gun in my pocket, and I AM glad to see you.
That parrot wouldn't VROOM if you put 5000 volts to it!
That rap tune is really the Polyvtsian Dance #2 by Borodin.
That which can be imagined can also actually be realized.
That which does not kill me had better run away damn fast!
That which does not kill us makes us stronger.
That which does not kill us took its ball and went home.
That Which Doesn't Kill Me Better Run Away Damn Fast!
That which makes life good, makes death good also...
That's stronger than a garlic milkshake.
The above opinions are those of my computer!
The absence of alternatives clears the mind marvelously.
The arrogance of age must submit to be taught by youth.
The best blood at times gets into fools and mosquitoes.
The Big Bang is only the universe rebooting.
The bigger they are, the harder they punch.
The Bill of Rights: Void Where Prohibited by Law
The Church has appropriated God for its own ends! - Machiavelli
The dead don't come back to life?  Be here at quitting time.
The Department of Agriculture is full of Dirtbags.
The Devil is most devilish when respectable.
THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT ? NOW OPEN THE CELL DOOR.
The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only heavier
The Few, The Proud, The Most Frequently Shot At...
The fient a tail she had to shake!
The first ten million years were the worst.
The floggings will continue until morale improves.
The four food groups.. coffee, ice cream, beer and pizza!
The gene pool has no lifeguard
The gene pool needs a lifeguard.
The Gods of one culture become the devils of the next...
The greatest production force is human selfishness. - Heinlein
The height of cleverness is to be able to conceal it.
The hippopotamus rests on his belly in the mud. And you?
The ideal wife is the woman who has an ideal husband.
The illuminati aren't out to get you.  What was your name again?
The last sound that it made was "Zap."
The light at the end of the tunnel is a buglight
The living world is a continuum in each and every aspect.
The Magical Mythstery Tour
The moat is off-limits to swimming, except to IRS agents
The more I get to thinking, the less I tend to laugh.
The more I hear about Microsoft, the less I like them.
The most interesting results happen only once.
The Novel:  Your imagination intensified.
The only GOOD user is a DEAD user
The only paradise is paradise lost.  -Marcel Proust
The only winner of the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky.
The ox is slow, but the Earth is patient.
The pen is mightier than the sword, but swords are more fun!
The Peregrine Plot Thickens...Alas, we are undone...
The polls show 8 out of 5 schizophrenics agree!
The prince hides his face from the dreams in the mist.
The problem drinker is the one who never buys.
The refrigerator light DOES go out.  Now let me out of here.
The Results of your IQ test came back. They're negative.
The Ringworld is Unstable!
The road to hell is paved with legislation.
The road to success is always under construction.
The Roman Empire never died it became the Catholic Church
The Second Amendment -- my concealed-weapons "permit"
The secrecy of my job prevents me from knowing what I do.
The secret of DoubleSpace: Randomly loses half your data
The Strange are strange but to men, but familiar to God.
The sun comes up too early for my liking!
The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time
The tenants are then chopped up by the rotating knifes...
The thrill of the chase is worth the pain.
The toughest thing in business is minding your own.
The trouble with political jokes is they get elected.
The truth is rarely pure, and never simple. (Wilde)
The truth is the safest lie.
The truth, however, is not pertinent to the issue.
The universe by time's fell hand defaced.
The universe is laughing behind your back.
The universe is very BIG. Believe me.
The way to a man's heart is with a broadsword.
The way to a man's heart: between the ribs, and slightly up.
The way to a woman's heart is through her ribs.
The weather's here, wish you were beautiful...
The weed of crime bears bitter fruit but I like the taste
The wise learn more from fools than fools from the wise.
The word today is "legs".....Help spread the word!
The words are there, my dear, but the music is wanting.
The world ended yesterday; sorry, you missed it.
The world ends at 8 P. M.... Film at 11.
The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.
The worst thing about censorship is ##########.
The X Insurance Co.---How may we shaft you?
There are only 3 lawyer jokes; the rest are true
There Are Three Sides To Every Story.
There are two secrets in life:  Never tell everything at once.
There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
There is infinite hope...... But not for us....
There is no fool like an old fool.  J.Heywood (1497-1580)
There is no intelligence on Earth, I'm just visiting.
There is no Pattern but that we impose on chaos.
There is no problem that cannot be solved by high explosives.
There is no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
There is no such thing as bravery; only degrees of fear.
There is no wealth but life. -- John Ruskin
There may be millions of votes, but I'm Gulliver.
There's a light, over at the Frankenstein place.
There's always one more bug.
There's not enough Sax and Violin's on TV
There's nothing a concentrated phaser blast can't solve.
They called him tall in the saddle till his blister broke
They got the library at Alexandria.  They're not getting mine.
They say act your age, and when you do they get mad.
They say God made All Men.  I say Samuel Colt made all men Equal.
Things are never so bad that they can't get worse.
Things in this room do not react well to bullets.
Things that appear simple, usually aren't.
Things you never hear people say: Please saw my leg off.
Think of it as evolution in action.
This blade here is my best friend....
This is another fine myth you've gotten me into.
This is beginning to get on my nerves, now that I have some.
This is Discussion; Arguments & Abuse is down the hall.
This message is SHAREWARE!  To Register, send $25.
This message will disappear in five seconds
This message will self-destruct in 5 seconds...
This message written with recycled electrons.
This MSG created by pouring warm tea on a Ouiji board.
This offer void except where prohibited by law.
This Space still for rent. Unreasonable rates
This tag is invisible to anyone with a higher IQ than me.
This tagline is a virus.  Kis C:\*.* goodbye.
This tagline is NAGWARE!  To remove it send $15.00.
This talgine meats all U.S. Guvermnint standerds.
This time he really is dead Jim, he he he.
Thomas Jefferson was a friend of mine... * @TO@
Those that have the firepower make the rules.
Those truly alive wrestle truly with their own souls.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Those who live by the sword KILL those who don't.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's tagline.
Thou shalt not post messages while drunk.
Three can keep a secret, if two are dead.
Tighten 'til it cracks, then back off 1/2 turn.
Time and distance are out of place here.
Time for the penguin on your telly to explode .....
Time keeps everything from happening all at once.
Time machine, my foot. Why, it couldn't tell you the time, much less..
To be, or not to be. What does it really matter...
To boldly go where no man has any business.
To discover one knows nothing is the beginning of wisdom.
To eat or not to eat, the question is whom to eat!
To err is human, to forgive is against company policy.
To err is human, to forgive........$5.00
To every rule there is an exception, and vice versa.
To get back on your feet, miss 2 car payments.
To live now, first come to terms with your past.
To quote the Librarian at Unseen University, "Oook!"
To really live, you must almost die.
To remove virus, type Format C: at the prompt and...
To scan, or not to scan. There may be a vir^@#@&_*^|>
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.
To take the Genesis online IQ test: press Alt/H
To tolerate everything is to teach nothing.
Today is the first day of the mess of your life.
Too bad about your Rectocranial Inversion. Get well soon
Took an hour to bury the cat. The silly thing kept movin'
Torture: The Ultimate Art Form.
Total is $1000. $10 for the upgrade, and $990 s/h.
Tradition: The art of making the same mistake over and over.
Transplated musical instrument explodes.  Organ rejection suspected.
Tree falls in forest.  Hits Milli Vanilli.  Someone else screams.
Trespassers will be SHOT, survivors will be SHOT again.
Trilogy (n). Series of three books, sometimes more.
Truck Pulls: for people who don't understand WWF.
Trust everyone, but always cut the cards.
Trust me, Ignore the rash.
Truth is shorter than fiction.  -Irving Cohen
Try filling a light bulb with gasoline and putting it in a socket.
TV Truth #5: Drinking beer attracts beautiful females.
Twisted mind? No, just bent in several strategic places
Twisted?  No, just bent in several strategic places.
Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.
Two Great Tennesseans:  Charlie and Jack Daniels
Two peanuts were walking down a street, one was assaulted
Type in the Gettysburg Address to continue..._
Unbounded is thy rage; with varied style
Unfair competition: Selling cheaper than we do.
Unknown Error on Unknown Device for Unexplainable Reason.
Use DEVICE = EXXON to screw up your environment.
Users: Keep them dry and don't feed them after midnight.
Vacation in the billion worlds of a used book store . . .
Vampire making daquiri:  blend me a tenor.
Vampire robs sperm bank in state of confusion, news at 11
Veni Vidi Fetuccini: I came, I saw, I had lunch.
Veni, vidi, clinti:  I came, I saw, I lied.
Very good, Einstein, but next time show your work.
Veteran of the Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force 1990-1951
Viking Foreplay:  "HEY! YOU! C'MERE!"
Violence in reality is quite different from theory.
Virus located.  Delete c:\window\*.*? y/n
Visit your money this year: Vacation in Washington DC
void main (void) { if (windows=="useful") hell=frozen } ă
Vote NO with the weapon of your choice.
Wagner's music is better than it sounds. - Twain
Wanderers and nomads have gone to see their chieftains.
Wanna do something big?  Pick up a boulder.
Wanna read a good horror novel? Get a history book
Want more grey hair?  Teach your child to drive!
Want my guns?     Come in range and get them.
Want to own a small business? Buy a big one and wait...
Wanted dead or alive -- Schrodinger's cat!
Wanted: Guillotine operator. Good chance to get ahead.
Wanted: Programmers. Some assembly required.
War is just Nature's way of keeping humanity in check.
War never decides who is right, only who is left.
Warm the Northeast...use aerosol spray!
Warning: bonds skin.
Warnings are for people without imagination.
Warped, and proud of it.
Warped, twisted, sick, and proud of it.
Watch it - You're trying my infinite patience
Ways to skin a cat: #27 --- Use a belt sander.
We are NOT surrounded.  We are in a target-rich environment.
We come in peace, shoot to kill.
We come not to discuss reality, but to use the BBS.
We don't care, we don't have to: We're Exxon.
We don't care. We don't have to. We're The Phone Company.
We have enough scientists; we need more hunchbacks, Igor.
We have met the enemy and they is us.
We have nothing to fear but sanity itself.
We must flee before they set loose the marmosets upon us!
We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing.
We said you'd get your money back, we didn't say when.
We should back the Metric system every inch of the way
We used to be Schizophrenic.
We want a war the whole family can watch!
We want peaceful relations, or we'll blow up your planet.
We would gladly feast on those who would subdue us.
We'll get standards even if we have to bribe someone!
We're entering the Bond-Age, in more ways than one.
We've broken the space-time continuum and passed the savings on to you!
We've missed you; we'll aim better next time!
Welcome to hell -- here's your copy of Windows.
Well, at least I'm improving my cold tolerance.
Well, I might be high, but...but I'm REAL fast!
Well, I'd like to see you resist.
Well, it seemed like the thing to do at the time.
Well, it was only plan A; plan B is much more interesting.  Really.
Well, it worked the last time I tried this....
Well, it's got *SOME* rat in it .....
Whaddya mean you don't STAPLE diskette labels on?
What colour wine is served with BOILED TONGUE?
What does it mean when your fortune cookie is empty?
What does the Infantry call Airborne? Skeet Shoot!
What does this red button do?
What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art.
What has 4 legs and an arm? A pit bull.
What if there were no hypothetical situations?
What is Redneck foreplay? (Nudge) Are you awake?
What is the purpose of hanging up if I'm calling again tomorrow?
What is this tiny hole in the bathroom wall for?
What type of support were you looking for?  Tech or Jock?
What we need is a Pizza Door and a Beer Door
What?!?  DOSSHELL *isn't* supposed to be a joke?
When all else fails, do something else.
When all else fails, refer to the destructions.
When childhood dies, its corpses are called adults.
When donating your brain to science, make sure science wants it.
When governments fall, people like me are lined up & shot
When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
When I was a kid we had to carve our CPU's out of wood...
When in doubt - comment it out.
When in doubt, attack the old bearded guy in the back.
When in doubt, run in circles and scream and shout.
When life gets weird, the weird get a life.
When need arises, any tool close to you becomes a hammer
When people agree with me, I always feel that I must be wrong.
When subtlety fails us we must resort to cream pies.
When symmetries are broken, things begin.
When the going gets tough, most people leave
When the mind is ready, a teacher appears. - Zen
When you get there, there's no there there.
When you seek it, you cannot find it.  -Zen
When's the trial? - Right after the hanging...
Where are we going...and why am I in this handbasket??
where do they hide those swords????!!!
Where do you find 100 talking invertebrates? The US Senate!
Where might is master, justice is servant.
Where they burn books, people are next.
Which one of you alien sombitch artists made these gawddammed circles?
Which version of the truth would you prefer today?
Which way did they go!? I'm they're leader!!
While the lunatic dreams, the Earth changes
Whip me, beat me and cover me in chocolate.  Please.
Whip me; beat me; make me register bad software.
Whips & chains?  Sorry, thats a hardware problem.
White dwarf seeks red giant for binary relationship.
Who beta tested Preparations A through G?
Who is General Failure and why's he reading my hard disk?
Who popped the cork on my lunch!?
Who wants to live forever?
Who watches the watchmen?
Who you callin' "argumentative", Bucko?
Whoever said that work was fun, didn't work!
Whom gods would destroy, they first teach MS-DOS.
Whom the mad would destroy, they first make gods.
Why are there so many gnarly limbs on my family tree?
Why be normal?
Why buy Cologne when you can wipe a magazine on yourself.
Why do they put locks on the doors of 24 hour stores?
Why get even, when you can get odd?
Why me?
Why not invite her over for a Scotch and sofa?
Why?
Wife:  A slave who demands to be set on a throne˙
William K. Smith:"Wait, my uncle Ted can drive you home."
WindowError:001 Windows loaded.  System in danger.
WindowError:005 Multitasking attempted.  System confused.
WindowError:00F Unexplained Error,  Please tell us how it happened.
WindowError:01E Timing error. Please wait eight years...
Windows - the solution to a problem that didn't exist
Windows 3.1 -- The best $89 solitaire game on the market.
Windows Backup Started:  Insert disk 1 of 38,544
Windows Error 005: Multitasking attempted. System confused.
Windows Error: 002 - No error yet ...
Windows Error: 004 - Operator fell asleep while waiting.
Windows is to OS/2 what Etch-a-Sketch is to art.
Windows isn't crippleware: it's "Fuctionally Challenged"
Windows NT: An imaginary OS for your imaginary 686 PC.
Windows NT: Needs Terabytes
Windows NT: The only 80 meg solitaire game.
Windows NT?  Is that the new NinTendo GUI?
Windows: big, expensive, pretty virus.
Windows: Proof that MS has a room of monkeys with PC's
Windows: the $89 solution to your excess speed problem.
Windows:(n.)1. Something that comes with the mouse you bought.
Windows:(n.)2. The Gates of hell.
Windows:(n.)4. Proof that God has a sense of humor.
Windoze for Workgroups: Why crash 1 when you can crash 6?
Windws is ine for bckgroun comunicaions - Bll Gats, 192
Winning or losing doesn't matter until you lose...
Winter is Natures way of saying, "Up Yours!"
Wise Man cross river *THEN* insult alligator.
Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them...
With caller ID, Cthulhu hasn't dialed out in ages!...
With consequences,  the unexpected always predominate.
Wizard's Guild Parking: Violators will be toad.
Women and cats do as they like.  Men and dogs better get used to it.
Women are to be served and obeyed!
Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal˙
WOMEN-Wierd Obnoxious Male Enticing Nymphs
Women... you can't live with 'em... pass the beer nuts.
Women: Can't live with 'em, and sheep can't cook.
Won spell Czecker, works grate!  $5 oar best offer.
Work fascinates me.  I can sit and watch it for hours.
Would all ghouls in the audience please raise their talons?
Would you prefer cache or chkdsk for payment?
WOW!  I Didn't know a 386 could smoke like that!!!
Write all complaints legibly in this space -> []
Written at @TIME@, on @MONTH@ @DATE@ in Knoxville, Tn.
Written on a Cray Laptop  (I'm from Texas and I'm BIG)
Yeah, but what's the speed of darkness...
Yes, I do believe that is my axe in your chest...
Yes, son, long ago, mail was written with pen and paper.
You and me against the world?  Great!  When do we attack?!?
You are only young once, but you can always be immature
You are the Amoeba. You have the power to Flow.
You are the Senate.  You have the power to filibuster.
You can lead a man to knowledge, but you cannot make him think.
You can tie me up, but you can't tie me down.
You can trust me.  I'm not a doctor.
You CAN trust the government...ask any Indian.
You could have knocked me over with a fender.
You disgust me! Do it some more....
You don't still use a human and a keyboard do you?
You expect mere PROOF to change my opinion?
You gawddammed aliens keep your ship out of my wheat field!!!
You got any more taglines I can plagerize?
You haven't lived a full life until you're dead.
You hold 'em off, I'll go for help.  (heh-heh-heh)
You Klingon son, you killed my bastard... err, wait...
You know what they say about paradigms: shift happens
You know, my sister was bitten by a moose once...
You laughable bowl of mutilated cow cud.
You live and learn. Or you don't live long. - Robert Heinlein
You make it we take it.
You may be recognized soon.  Perhaps you should hide?
You may be Southern -- but you're no Comfort.
You now have 10 minutes to reach a safe distance.
You remind me of myself, confused and hungover...
You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.
You shall know the truth, and it shall make you odd.
You should presently be able to deal from a full deck.
You'll never be the man your mother was!
You're a Redneck if: You're entertained by a 6-pack
You're all insane and trying to steal my magic bag
You're floatin' for a slit-throatin'...
You're in a maze of twisty echo conferences, all alike.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
You're really strange @TO@, really strange...
You're right - now shut up, someone might hear you....
You're sick and you're twisted...Are we related???
You're staring at me like I'm driving the nails.
You're twisted and sick, I like that in a person.
You're twisted, perverted and sick.  I like that.
You're worse than a fungus...
You've got nicer legs than Hitler...
Your eyes are a striking shade of (insert color)
Your father is waiting for you in the toolshed...
Your friendly neighbourhood Thought Police . . .
Your Lucky Number Has Been Disconnected.
Your mileage may vary.  Your car may not run.
Your new credit limit is $1. Have a nice day.
Your proctologist called.  He found your head.
Yours for the asking.  Torture never works.
Yur'assic Park: Where you butt is on the line daily
Zealots have fanatical tendencies.
Zen Crafters - enlightenment in about an hour.
Zen Druids practice Transcendental Vegetation.
Zo! Lie here and tell me about your mother, Herr Heinlein!
Zymurgy is the best hobby around, homemade hangovers...
[Maxim XII] Plan and Replan Your Sequence -Brown
_You_ see a coffin.  _I_ see a cheap living module.
